Wedding day tips for your BIG FAT PAKISTANI WEDDING!
If you’re having a Big Fat Pakistani wedding then this blog post is a must read! Over the years I’ve seen my fair share of mishaps at weddings, especially Pakistani weddings! With the proper planning we can try to minimize the chance of any mishaps occurring. Keep these tips in mind to ensure your special day goes as smoothly as possible. Please note, this list is a work in progress. If more things come to mind, I will be sure to add on.
Here’s my list of wedding day tips!
- Prepare a detailed itinerary at least 10 days prior to the wedding. An itinerary is essential if you want to have some sort of organization at your wedding. An itinerary will not only benefit you, but also your vendors (especially your photographer). Without an itinerary, there is no structure/no flow of the wedding day and chaos is likely to ensue. As a photographer, I need to review the itinerary to ensure that everything is doable and makes sense. It also helps immensely when we know what is coming next so we can prepare accordingly. What do I mean by “prepare accordingly? What I mean is we have ample time to change lighting set up (if we need to), or change our lens, move our equipment, etc. When preparing the itinerary, provide as much detail as possible. For example, instead of writing 10pm – Ruksathi, include details. A better description would be: 10pm: Ruksathi- immediate family will accompany bride and groom from ballroom to hotel entrance via the hotel lobby, after saying good byes to family we will depart in a limo. This lets us photographers know that we need to plan accordingly because if we need to go outside at 10pm, we would need to bring appropriate lighting with us, knowing this beforehand gives us time to prepare for what’s coming next. Mentioning the hotel lobby is also helpful, so we know which way to go and again, which lighting will work in the lobby. I usually request an itinerary about 2 weeks before the wedding date.
- Be sure to declutter your getting ready room. Pick up anything off the floor, make the bed, clean the dresser to make it look tidy. The less clutter, the better. Your photos will look a lot better without all the clutter!
- When getting ready, try to use a room with windows if possible. If you have windows, open the blinds/curtains and get ready where the window light is falling (as close to the window as possible). With window light, there will be no need to turn on the room lights.
- Look at the track record of your makeup artist before you book them! Do they do multiple bride’s in one day? If so, do they arrive on time? I’ve seen too many occasions where the Makeup Artist arrives late, sometimes by as much as 2 hours. This happens more often when the Makeup Artist is coming from another bride’s house/venue. If your Makeup Artist is 2 hours late, then EVERYTHING on the itinerary is going to be affected. You won’t have enough time for photos and we will have to make some cuts somewhere to make up for lost time.
- Be very careful of the pin placement on your dress to ensure it’s where you want it to be. We leave it up to the bride to place the pins as she likes it to hold the dress in place. Keep in mind, if the pin placement is creating a clump on your back or elsewhere, that is how the photos will turn out. We do NOT photoshop hundreds of photos to fix something like this. Please take a good look in the mirror when all pins are placed to make sure you are happy with how the dress looks.
- I highly recommend doing a trial with your MUA beforehand so you have a rough idea of how long it takes once the MUA does arrive.
- If your nikkah is on your wedding day, check with your Imam’s schedule for the day. I have seen some Imam’s running as much as 2 hours late. Again, this will greatly affect the rest of your timeline. Although this is much less common then the MUA arriving late, it does happen from time to time.
- I highly recommend a “first look” right before the photoshoot. The first look should happen immediately after the make up is ready. If it’s a hot day, you don’t want your makeup to run. A first look is when the bride and groom see each other firs the first time on the wedding day. It makes for an intimate moment which creates an emotional photo opportunity. Keep in mind I said intimate – only the bride and groom. No family members, no friends lurking in the background. Family and friends create distractions which takes away from the moment. If they start chit chat, we will lose time with first look and photos. Also, if you have a wedding planner, ensure they stay behind the photographer at all times. The location of the first look should be a nice one. As an example, the exterior grounds of the venue (if it’s nice), a nearby park or garden, etc. In case of inclement weather, perhaps the hotel lobby or stage would make a good choice. I usually scout the location beforehand to provide my suggestions on where the first look should be.
- Reserve at least 1-2 hours for photoshoot time on your wedding day. Please keep in mind, the bride’s dress is usually very heavy. If we need to walk a lot, it could take time to get from one place to another, especially if it’s a large venue. We also need to incorporate some solo bridal portraits during this time. The more time we have, the better. Lighting setups from shot to shot can also take a minute or two, but trust me, it will be totally worth it!
- During the bride and groom photoshoot, just focus on each other and act natural. Pretend as if there are no camera’s pointed at you. Some people tend to “freeze” in front of the camera. It’s a lot easier if you relax and be yourself. No need to worry about what to do, I will provide guidance but my vision is always to make the photos as natural as possible. Also, there’s no need to look at the camera for every shot. Only look at the camera if I instruct you to do so.
- Keep any colored stage uplighting during the reception off of peoples faces. Colorful spotlights pointed on the background may look great, but remember, your family will be coming onto the stage for photos. That means the colored lights will bounce onto your family’s faces. No one wants to see their family members with pink, purple, or green faces. If you have colored lights, make sure they are dim, or point them towards the wall and not the stage backdrop.
- Some stage setups have curtains or pillars in the front. I DO NOT recommend you get this type of stage. Having a curtain or pillars will block our light from reaching the people on the stage.
- Make sure there are no tables or other distracting objects near the stage. For larger group shots we need to step back a bit, and it doesn’t look pleasant if we have tables right in the front (they will show up in the photo).
- Friends and Family photos on stage need to be handled in an organized manner. This is perhaps the most important one during reception. If this isn’t handled properly, total chaos will ensue, and I’ve seen it all too often. What you want to do is create a list, in priority order, of any and all group shots. This list should be provided to the DJ so he can call out one by one. Alternatively, you could have the DJ call up each table you would like photos with. He should specify that ONLY the table that is being called should come up for photos. Things run much more smoothly
when the stage photos are handled this way because it avoids cluttering of people on and around the stage. DO NOT have people form a line next to the stage for photos. This creates overcrowding of people by the stage. Anyone that is not in a group picture should not be on or near the stage. If the DJ says something like “anyone from the groom side come up for photos now” – this will create a big mess of people on and around the stage. Specific groups or tables should be called and the DJ should mention that only the people being called should come up for stage photos. - The DJ should be ready to make an announcement in case of overcrowding of guests around the stage. This creates a big problem for us photographers when taking pictures of guests on stage. What happens is a crowd of guests will be holding their cell phones to take photos and the people on stage won’t know where to look. As a photographer, I try my best to control the crowd-but I’m only one person. So if you have a point person that can assist that would help greatly. If #14 is followed then this usually isn’t a big problem.
- During the Bride and Groom entrance, ask the DJ to announce that guests stay in seats. Otherwise our shots will be blocked by guests standing up holding their cell phones. If a guest stands up suddenly and we have to move to get a shot, we could miss a critical shot in those few seconds. Also, please try to avoid spotlights during entrances. If we need to suddenly change settings due to the spotlight, we could miss a few seconds of the entrance. If you are planning on having spotlights, please let us know beforehand. Lastly, if you have any colored lights during entrances, please have them pointed on the walls and not on the people making the entrances.
- Kids need to be kept busy at weddings. We’ve all seen kids running wild at Pakistani weddings. If you want your wedding to be an elegant, high class affair, then I highly recommend hiring an entertainer such as a clown, magician, etc. and keeping them in a separate room of the venue. Alternatively, you could mention on the invite not to bring kids, however we all know that’s not going to happen at a desi wedding LOL. At least with the entertainer the kids don’t get bored and we don’t have kids running around all wild. It becomes a real problem when we have dozens of kids running around and coming in to our shots.
- Lastly, it goes without saying, as desi’s we love to take photos. At almost every wedding we find “uncle Tom’s” – these are guests at the wedding who think they are professionals and think they can follow us around all day long and shadow us. We do NOT allow this. Please try to tell your guests to enjoy the day and let US worry about capturing the moment. Having someone follow us around is very distracting, will make us miss shots if they are in the way, and subjects also get confused where to look. Not only that, but their photos will not be comparable to ours (TRUST ME!). We will be using only the best equipment, camera settings will be changed on the fly for every shot, and thousands of dollars of lighting will be used in conjunction with the camera+ best lenses. Guest photos are good to have but not at the expense of losing professional photos from your photographer. Our photos will be a 1,000x better! If at all possible, please let all your guests know beforehand to be in the moment and enjoy themselves, and let us worry about documenting the day.
Need some venue recommendations for your big Fat Pakistani wedding? Here’s a few I highly recommend:
Feel free to reach out and I will provide more recommendations!
Click here to see some of the Pakistani weddings that I’ve photographed.